I’m not sure why suddenly I had the urge to express myself in a healthy way. I figured I’d been using Facebook as a platform to voice everything that has been on my mind. Sadly, as many people come to find out, not everyone is necessarily interested in what you have to say. In an effort to not strain any friendships, I think it’s best to post on here instead.

On evenings like these, you know, those nights where your mind is racing, you begin to ponder on life. I have been doing a lot of this recently. Lately, it has dawned on me that I’m actually getting older. Being 24, I’m starting to see the difference in my own tastes, behaviors, and the people I choose to surround myself with. Long gone are those days when all I wanted to do was hang out with people and go out constantly. I find myself preferring to just chill out in my bedroom and geek out over this new flight simulator game that I recently purchased for my PC. I wondered, “What is going on?”. After reading through many blog posts, I realized that I was not the only one who has been experiencing this change in themselves as they get older.

Some may call this a quarter-life crisis. However, I won’t classify this stage in my life as something so extremely named despite the title of this blog post. Looking back on how far I’ve come, though, I can honestly say that I am very proud of myself for how far I’ve come making this what I would call “A Quarter Life Celebration”.

Sometimes, I wish to get my story out there to continue to inspire myself and to inspire others. As far as I can remember, I’ve always held myself up to a high expectation. The self-discipline I expect from myself has given me a life full of success. I worked hard to get here, though. I had to literally claw my way up and ask for a lot of help along the way. The blood, sweat, and tears it took me to get this far make me feel accomplished on nights like these when my mind is racing, and I’m evaluating my current life and reminiscing on where I was way back when. The saying goes, “You aren’t the same person as you were last year,” holds some truth when you stop and take a look at yourself and your life. From the relationships you’ve built, the places you’ve worked, the lessons you’ve learned, and the cities you’ve lived in.

Because of the challenges I’ve faced, I want to put my story out there for people to read and take what they can from it. I also want to use this platform as a therapeutic way to express myself. A healthy outlet is necessary for everyone. I’m hoping I may have found mine since I like to write a lot and my brain likes to think a lot.

These blog posts will come in a series of posts. I do not have a timeline for when I will post. Instead, I’ll let my thoughts and feelings on a day to day basis manifest themselves through these posts. I will start this one off by giving a brief background of where I come from.

I grew up poor. I’m the oldest of six children. I was born into an interracial family. My mom is a fair-skinned Latina, and my dad is a French Creole Puerto Rican with dark skin. We never really had much growing up. When I was born, my parents were not self-supporting. They still depended on their own parents to sustain them. Also, I was the product of infidelity. My dad had cheated on his wife with my mom, and I was the result.

My mom had low self-esteem despite being raised by amazing hard-working parents. My dad, also being raised relatively comfortably in terms of income, grew up down the street from her. He was unfortunately born into a family who did not treat him well however. His parents did not show their love like you would necessarily see on TV. This led him to make poor choices as he grew into an adult. The drugs he grew addicted to in an effort to suppress his inner pain led him to make bad decisions. Sadly, these decisions led to 9 kids from two different women with horrible financial habits and bad employment aptitude due to his drug use and low self-esteem.

Because of the values my parents had, the childhood I had was far from glamorous. However, I became aware at an early age of what it might take to achieve this “glamorous” life I’ve always craved.